| |
| SHE bade me follow to her garden, where | |
| The mellow sunlight stood as in a cup | |
| Between the old grey walls; I did not dare | |
| To raise my face, I did not dare look up, | |
| Lest her bright eyes like sparrows should fly in | 5 |
| My windows of discovery, and shrill Sin. | |
| |
| So with a downcast mien and laughing voice | |
| I followed, followed the swing of her white dress | |
| That rocked in a lilt along: I watched the poise | |
| Of her feet as they flew for a space, then paused to press | 10 |
| The grass deep down with the royal burden of her: | |
| And gladly Id offered my breast to the tread of her. | |
| |
| I like to see, she said, and she crouched her down, | |
| She sunk into my sight like a settling bird; | |
| And her bosom couched in the confines of her gown | 15 |
| Like heavy birds at rest there, softly stirred | |
| By her measured breaths: I like to see, said she, | |
| The snap-dragon put out his tongue at me. | |
| |
| She laughed, she reached her hand out to the flower, | |
| Closing its crimson throat. My own throat in her power | 20 |
| Strangled, my heart swelled up so full | |
| As if it would burst its wine-skin in my throat, | |
| Choke me in my own crimson. I watched her pull | |
| The gorge of the gaping flower, till the blood did float | |
| |
| Over my eyes, and I was blind | 25 |
| Her large brown hand stretched over | |
| The windows of my mind; | |
| And there in the dark I did discover | |
| Things I was out to find: | |
| My Grail, a brown bowl twined | 30 |
| With swollen veins that met in the wrist, | |
| Under whose brown the amethyst | |
| I longed to taste. I longed to turn | |
| My hearts red measure in her cup, | |
| I longed to feel my hot blood burn | 35 |
| With the amethyst in her cup. | |
| |
| Then suddenly she looked up, | |
| And I was blind in a tawny-gold day, | |
| Till she took her eyes away. | |
| So she came down from above | 40 |
| And emptied my heart of love. | |
| So I held my heart aloft | |
| To the cuckoo that hung like a dove, | |
| And she settled soft. | |
| |
| It seemed that I and the morning world | 45 |
| Were pressed cup-shape to take this reiver | |
| Bird who was weary to have furled | |
| Her wings in us, | |
| As we were weary to receive her. | |
| |
| This bird, this rich, | 50 |
| Sumptuous central grain, | |
| This mutable witch, | |
| This one refrain, | |
| This laugh in the fight, | |
| This clot of night, | 55 |
| This core of delight. | |
| |
| She spoke, and I closed my eyes | |
| To shut hallucinations out. | |
| I echoed with surprise | |
| Hearing my mere lips shout | 60 |
| The answer they did devise. | |
| Again I saw a brown bird hover | |
| Over the flowers at my feet; | |
| I felt a brown bird hover | |
| Over my heart, and sweet | 65 |
| Its shadow lay on my heart. | |
| I thought I saw on the clover | |
| A brown bee pulling apart | |
| The closed flesh of the clover | |
| And burrowing in its heart. | 70 |
| |
| She moved her hand, and again | |
| I felt the brown bird cover | |
| My heart; and then | |
| The bird came down on my heart, | |
| As on a nest the rover | 75 |
| Cuckoo comes, and shoves over | |
| The brim each careful part | |
| Of love, takes possession, and settles her down, | |
| With her wings and her feathers to drown | |
| The nest in a heat of love. | 80 |
| |
| She turned her flushed face to me for the glint | |
| Of a moment. See, she laughed, if you also | |
| Can make them yawn. I put my hand to the dint | |
| In the flowers throat, and the flower gaped wide with woe. | |
| She watched, she went of a sudden intensely still, | 85 |
| She watched my hand, to see what I would fulfil. | |
| |
| I pressed the wretched, throttled flower between | |
| My fingers, till its head lay back, its fangs | |
| Poised at her. Like a weapon my hand was white and keen, | |
| And I held the choked flower-serpent in its pangs | 90 |
| Of mordant anguish, till she ceased to laugh, | |
| Until her prides flag, smitten, cleaved down to the staff. | |
| |
| She hid her face, she murmured between her lips | |
| The low word Dont. I let the flower fall, | |
| But held my hand afloat towards the slips | 95 |
| Of blossom she fingered, and my fingers all | |
| Put forth to her: she did not move, nor I, | |
| For my hand like a snake watched hers, that could not fly. | |
| |
| Then I laughed in the dark of my heart, I did exult | |
| Like a sudden chuckling of music. I bade her eyes | 100 |
| Meet mine, I opened her helpless eyes to consult | |
| Their fear, their shame, their joy that underlies | |
| Defeat in such a battle. In the dark of her eyes | |
| My heart was fierce to make her laughter rise. | |
| |
| Till her dark deeps shook with convulsive thrills, and the dark | 105 |
| Of her spirit wavered like water thrilled with light; | |
| And my heart leaped up in longing to plunge its stark | |
| Fervour within the pool of her twilight, | |
| Within her spacious soul, to grope in delight. | |
| |
| And I do not care, though the large hands of revenge | 110 |
| Shall get my throat at last, shall get it soon, | |
| If the joy that they are searching to avenge | |
| Have risen red on my night as a harvest moon, | |
| Which even death can only put out for me; | |
| And death, I know, is better than not-to-be. | 115 |
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